Bare MFM

We climb into bed, the three of us. This has happened before, a number of times. We have a routine, and I am pretty sure we all enjoy it. I know I do.

You start massaging my tits and stomach and thighs, slowly working your way toward my pussy. You kiss my neck passionately, making me shiver literally from my little toes up to the crown of my head. It’s about as good as an orgasm. Waves of shivers pass over my skin. I moan. I want.

And you are laying on the other side of me. I lean over and we kiss, tenderly at first and then it becomes more rough. You grab my neck, making me gasp in surprise and ecstasy.

I have two hands, and two cocks to rub. I take hold of each, stroking, feeling both grow larger and larger in my hands, throbbing. Waiting for my pussy. This warm-up is standard, and it turns me on like crazy every time. I want both at the same time for a long time.

I go down on one of you until you can’t take it anymore. You get behind me in doggy style while I go down on you, the other wonderful you. The pounding makes me yell and scream, so much so I can barely continue my blow job. You love watching my face, and you pull my hair and grab my throat.

You are slamming me harder and harder, and it feels so fucking good. Your bare cock inside me. I want your come, I yell. Fill me up. And you do.

I catch my breath, and get on top of you. I love having two loads inside, and I intend to get that. I’m riding you harder and harder, faster and faster. You’re squeezing my tits, breathing harder and harder. I tell you, I want your come, give it to me. And you do.

And sometimes, I’m on top of you and my other you gets behind so I have both cocks at once inside me. The fullness and taboo and raunchiness of this position makes me come. Both bare cocks sliding inside, both loads of come making me moan from pleasure.

Always, I want it again.

Yummy dreams

I’ve dreamed about you since I last saw you. I used to stare at you, for four years, I stared at you. We never talked- maybe once or twice. I’m not sure what exactly about you I lusted after. But I dream about you still. Always delicious dreams. You tease me in my dreams, like you did unknowingly when we were 16. Sometimes my dreams became raunchy group sex scenes with you and all of your friends from high school, but you and I still do not interact.

Last night, though, this time, when I saw you, I grabbed your hand and ran with you into an empty room. We kissed, you grabbed my body, feeling it for the first time. I jumped up, you held me, my legs wrapped around your back. I felt ecstatic. The charge was electric. I was so turned on and wanted you so badly.

J was in another place, another room. Knew what I was doing, and was excited to hear about it later. Two close friends appeared, laughing at my ecstasy.

We stopped kissing, your eyes told me that it couldn’t go any further because you have a girlfriend. “Dream me” cared, but didn’t want to. Wanted to disregard the ethics of the situation. But you were resolute and that was okay. I was still riding the joy from taking charge, grabbing you, having you follow, kissing you.

I have been noticing new energy in my life the past few days. I feel “on”- turned on, integrated, joyful even when I’m feeling sad. Our two sexy friends came over last night to celebrate a birthday, and it was magnificently delicious. I’m crushing hard on another beautiful friend, and I love that feeling. And then these dreams I have- it’s like I get to continue to feel that charge through my sleep. I love it.

Sensual Dreams

Recording Yourself

My most recent post for DatingAdvice is live today! I had fun writing this one (and no, I did not come up with that title):

6 Ways to Make a Better Sex Tape Than Kim Kardashian

Read on for my intro, and make sure to go read the actual tips!

“Who out there likes to watch themselves have sex? (Who doesn’t?) Closet mirrors, mirrors on the ceiling, bathroom mirrors – all are prime looking places to get more turned on during a solo, partnered or group sexual encounter.

What’s the next step after mirrors? Recording, of course! Not only do you get the thrill of being recorded, but you get the ability to watch your session over and over later on.
Mirrors are great for in-the-moment satisfaction, but recording has a bit more staying power.
But how do you go about recording yourselves safely and correctly?
The first time J and I recorded ourselves was after we bit the bullet and bought a nifty camcorder and tripod. It was insanely hot for both of us to fuck in front of a camera and watch it later.
I had a feeling I would love it after realizing how much I like watching myself masturbate and have sex with others in front of a mirror. I will admit that even after multiple recording sessions, I still am self-conscious listening to myself. However, I love watching J!
I’ve also recorded a group sex session for J’s birthday and done a few other encounters with other male partners on camera. These are J’s favorite pieces of porn to watch (no lie!)”
Have you recorded yourself before? Do you have any tips that I definitely missed?

happy birthday

Today is my birthday!! 26 years young/old, beautiful, brave, and strong.

Last night I celebrated with a 2 1/2 hour long massage and a super hot threesome. What better way?? For reals- it was truly the best.

It’s a low key birthday this year, and that is just fine with me. It reflects how I’ve been feeling- a little more introverted and quiet. I’m resting. Things are changing at deep levels, and it’s a slow and sometimes painful process. I’ve set an intention for my year: that my internal emotional world is changing for the better. That I will start to feel, think, and act more loving toward myself and those around me. That the value of universal love will consume my being and my relationships with others. That fear and competitiveness and anger will fall to the sidelines of my experience. I feel confident and hopeful that the steps I’ve begun to take have already begun to take me to where I want to go.

Hopefully tonight J and I will watch the newest episode of Game of Thrones, and then we’re seeing some best friends tomorrow for dinner. We’re painting on Saturday and then having a formal birthday dinner together. It all sounds lovely and peaceful. I’m so grateful to be where I am and to have all of the support around me that I do, and a place to call home and a partner that I love and loves me too.

Sexy Storytelling

I had a Skype meeting last night with one of the producers of our local Mystery Box storytelling shows, and I am excited to work on two stories for them!

I told a narrative of my experience with school and stripping, but I also really want to work on one about the birthday gift that I did for J a couple years ago (the gangbang film).

Eric gave me some good feedback about how to structure the story.

Start with a beginning scene, add some narrative, describe another scene, add some narrative, describe another scene, etc.

Describing the moments that were particularly emotional and difficult to explain why for me this situation was so challenging.

Give the audience a flavor of who I am as a whole person before saying I’m a stripper.

This story is emotional for me and brings up a lot of vulnerability, and while this will draw an audience in, it also teeters on making me want to stand on my soapbox about sex worker rights which could alienate audience members.

The gangbang story is lighthearted and fun- a much different tone and intention.

In any case, I am excited about working on these and hopefully telling one or both sometime in the future!

Do you have any sexy stories you would ever share publicly like this? Maybe you should get in touch with Eric & Reba yourself! Or share here anonymously if the whole “standing in front of a bunch of strangers and talking about it” sounds a little intimidating (it does to me, too) 🙂

storytelling

My Favorite Threesome Positions

My latest DatingAdvice post is now live: My Favorite Threesome Positions

Read on for my intro, and please go read the rest if you are so inclined 🙂

“How do you actually have a threesome? I mean, I get you put three fun and sexually adventurous people together, but what are the mechanics of it? How do you fit three people together?

We don’t see threesomes in mainstream media, so unless you watch porn, you may feel a little stumped or even duped (Do people actually do that? Does it really feel good?)

I’m here to help.”

What are your favorite positions? Any majorly hot ones I missed?

Picking Your Third

My latest DA post is live: “How to Pick Your Third for a Threesome

Read on for my intro:

“You and your partner are ready to dive into some sexual explorations and want to invite another person into your bedroom. Who should you pick?

When J and I invite people into our bedroom, we do so based off some broad principles (which we have talked about before inviting others into our bedroom, and in some cases, figured out together after a disappointing experience).

1. Are we both attracted to the person?

Even if we are going to have an MFM in which J and the other man are not sexually into one another, it’s still important that J be intellectually and mentally connected to the other man.

Determining if we both dig someone else’s vibe, physically and energetically, is an important first step.”

Do you have certain criteria for inviting someone into your bedroom for a threesome?

Performance Anxiety During Group Sex

My next DatingAdvice post is live today: What If You Can’t Perform During Group Sex?

I think this is a common thing for people (not just men) to be concerned about. Female bodies just have the luxury of hiding their physical arousal or non-arousal more easily.

What have you done during a group sex encounter when you experienced performance anxiety? What helped you?

Here’s the conclusion of the article; go read the rest if you’re so inclined! 🙂

“If your cock isn’t hard, there could be a number of reasons.

In a group sex situation, often a non-erect cock has more to do with self-pressure to perform, nervousness or unfamiliarity with the situation or partner(s) than it does with attraction or interest in the situation or people involved.

Simply talking about it with your partners can help redirect your attention and energy away from one of your body parts to engaging with the people in the room. Offer to go down on someone or make out with someone.

Do your best to be present and if you become physically aroused, awesome. If you don’t, awesome.

If you are in the presence of other sexually intelligent people, then they will respect your body and communication and go with the flow, too.

Just have fun, relax and enjoy yourself. How many people get to experience group sex, anyway?”

Satisfying Connections & Emotions

I had a really fabulous weekend reconnecting with lovely people!

Not too long ago in counseling, I was telling my therapist that it sort of seemed to be the nature of having an open relationship that I experience loss often: Well we used to date them, and then we didn’t, and then we were friends, and now we haven’t seen them recently, and I miss seeing them. Oh, and I was dating her and it was an amazing experience, and now that relationship is just gone. And they live further away and we just don’t see them very often. Etc. etc. It makes for a dynamic social network, with people changing from new friends to play partners to close friends to romantic partners to close friends to more distant friends and back to close friends. It can be a lot for me to keep up with emotionally.

But this weekend we got to spend time with a lot of the people that I hold extremely close to my heart. Out dinner with some amazing friends that we haven’t spent much time with this fall; catching up, laughing, and eating felt so good. Some social and sexy time with our other sweet friends who we see a couple times a month; comfortable, relaxing, and satisfying social time and group sex always feels connecting for me. And our other besties over for dinner another night: real conversation about our real “stuff” made me feel totally in tune with them once again. Having some real social interactions with the people who I/we have gone through so much with in the past couple of years was deeply needed I think. And so I am so grateful that this weekend opened up and gave me all of that.

Now to switch gears for a minute:

J and I were at our swingers club on Friday (when I/we had social and sexy time), and it was the first time that J played with another person without me. And I was totally fine. I kept scanning myself for negative reactions and emotions, and I simply didn’t have them. There were pieces in place that allowed me to feel so comfortable, and hopeful that he had a good time. Our sweet friends were there, and I am so comfortable with them, that I just folded myself into them. If they hadn’t been there, I think I may have experienced some social anxiety. Also, J’s slight ambivalence about the situation helped me feel completely non-threatened by the person and proposed play. So, it would have been a different story I think if I didn’t have friends to be with and if J had fallen in love with this person at first sight. But as it was, it was totally relaxing to experience the compersive and easy nature of the situation.

This weekend was full of things to make my heart full and grateful: amazing friends, real connection, and pleasant, loving emotions. Happiness. Love. Sexy times. Yummy food.

(Not a bad way to kick off a week that will be full of family- I’m sure I’ll be writing on various things sparked by the holiday coming up. It’s really awesome to have so many positive connections and emotions salient before I embark on family time.)

The Elusive FMF- Is it really all it is cracked up to be?

K and I recently had the chance to experience an FMF thanks to a willing and adventurous woman from a couple that we have become close with recently.  First of all, I want to thank that other woman for being so adventurous and willing to hop right in and try something completely new despite being fairly new to all of this.
 
So, to put the FMF in perspective for our readers it is important to know that for K, this was all about my pleasure. 🙂  K, while comfortable playing with other women and occasionally turned on by those experiences, is primarily straight.  This meant that her motivation for inviting another woman to join us was primarily about turning me on and allowing me to have the experience of two women who were both there and interested in playing with me. 
 
In my imagination (yes I have thought about this before. . . a lot) this scenario sounded awesome but as this scenario started to seem more like a real possibility, I began to question whether this was something that I was really even interested in.  Since the option to play with other women is already available to me through couple play, group play, separate play, and other types of play, it meant that the only benefit of an FMF was literally having two women pleasing me at the same time.  Because, if I just wanted to be with other women, I could experience that through couple play or single play with other women in a one-on-one type setting. 
 
When I actually thought (realistically, not just fantasizing) about the logistics of the scenario I realized that I am always more than satisfied with just one woman in the bedroom.  I cannot recall a single time in my life when the woman I was with was completely drained while I lay there wanting more. This is especially true with K who is always more than willing to make sure I am satisfied by using her hands, mouth, toys, etc. in order to make sure that I am completely satisfied!
 
So, while the FMF sounded fun as a new experience to try (because, after all, you have to try something once to know whether or not you like it) I was not entirely sure how the logistics of the actual scenario would work out.
 
Not to sound completely ungrateful for the chance to try out this experience and for these two beautiful and open women who were willing to make this happen for me but. . . I am not sure that the reality of the situation really lived up to the fantasy.  To be perfectly honest, at times it felt like twice as much work without a lot of added benefit.  Throughout the situation I felt like it was quite difficult to just act naturally and follow my urges because I was constantly worried about a variety of things such as: whether or not I was giving equal time to both women, whether both women were satisfied, and if there were jealousy issues coming up. Even with the Hitachi Magic Wand as my partner, I was constantly trying to make sure that both women were satisfied, getting enough attention and enjoying the experience. It became somewhat overwhelming to keep track of all of these different factors and I sort of wished that I was alone and fantasizing about the experience rather than actually in the situation.  I think that as I feel more comfortable with K and more trusting of her ability to honestly communicate when she is having feelings of jealousy, an FMF experience will be more satisfying.  However, at the point we were at when we had this FMF, I was unsure about whether or not K was honestly communicating with me about her desire to have this experience.  Because of all of the emotional complications of this particular FMF, the sex was not quite as spectacular as there is likely potential for.
 
Besides all of the mental turn offs of attempting an FMF that I learned from my first attempt at an FMF, I confirmed that one woman is more than enough to satisfy me.  In my relationship I am almost always ready to be done with sex and to fall asleep before K.  Adding in a second woman who also needed physical attention, penetration, and kissing was simply more work than I was able to handle physically while still ensuring that both women were physically satisfied.  Thank goodness for the Hitachi Magic Wand because without that amazing device, these women would have been expecting way too much out of me.
 
While the FMF was overall a good experience, due in very large part to the wonderful women who made this experience possible, it was not everything that I imagined.  Perhaps I simply built up this situation too much in my mind.  The reality of the situation was that there were twice as many women in the room all expecting to leave the situation physically satisfied and there was a huge potential for emotional issues that left me feeling overwhelmed.  I look forward to trying this situation again in the future as it was overall a good experience but if it never happens again, I am just thankful for the opportunity I had to explore this with these two women.